These 2 Krusty Krab employees are always fun to watch.
We have an octopus that hates his job.
And a sea sponge that can’t get enough of work.
But have you ever thought about:
“If SpongeBob and Squidward end up fighting, who would win?”
Well, the answer will surprise you.
Continue reading to discover:
- A secret way for the grumpy octopus to come out on top in a battle.
- Who would win in a fight between SpongeBob Squarepants and Squidward.
- 3 moments that prove Squiddy’s secretly one of the strongest of Bikini Bottom.
- And so much more…
SpongeBob vs Squidward – who would win a fight?
SpongeBob would win in a fight against Squidward. The yellow table sponge is far stronger than his octopus co-worker. He also knows a lot of Squidward’s weaknesses. However, the grumpy octopus still has a fighting chance. And SpongeBob’s kindness will be his key to winning a battle to the death.
“Squidward’s smarter. So, of course, he wins this one.”
Well, you’re both right and wrong.
There’s no denying that the octopus’s far more intelligent than the table sponge.
And while he’s often unlucky.
Squidward’s always shown he’s far more aware of things than SpongeBob.
For example, the octopus is way better at being an adult.
He can drive almost any vehicle in Bikini Bottom.
And whether it’s a bicycle, boat, or even a bus.
Squidward’s skills definitely show.
A feat SpongeBob could never achieve.
When in fact, he’s failed the driving test 1,258,056 times.
But intelligence isn’t everything.
There’s more to a fight than being a smarty-pants.
So, even if the sponge can’t keep up with wits.
SpongeBob’s very strong and durable.
I know, it sounds impossible.
A sink sponge can’t be that tough, right?
Well, underneath that cute personality is an unstoppable force.
And while his strongest feats are played off as jokes.
They’re definitely true.
Achievements that even make superheroes look tiny in comparison.
For example, back in season 2, in the Fry Cook Games episode.
SpongeBob revealed he’s got quite a muscular physique.
And do you know who wrestled with him in an even match-up?
Well, it was his best friend, Patrick Star.
The same starfish that can lift a road without breaking a sweat.
So if SpongeBob were to get very serious in a fight.
Squidward’s not going to come out in one piece.
“Hey, Squidward’s been through a lot too. Maybe even more than the sea sponge”
Likewise, the honorable thing to do would be to give the octopus a fair shake.
And if we’re talking durability…
The grumpy cashier has seen the ugliest ends of the stick.
But does he ever raise the white flag and quit?
No, he doesn’t.
Squidward magically goes back to normal in the very next episode.
And it’s either he’s got one helluva’ healing factor.
Or the octopus features a very strong Toon Anatomy.
A plot device that lets a character survive mortal wounds and accidents.
Just for the sake of comedy.
For example, all the way back in season 1, in the SB-129 episode.
When Squiddy accidentally traveled 2000 years into the future.
He took a wrong turn and entered a room-sized can opener.
However, does this catastrophe send him to the hospital?
No, he just brushed it off.
In fact, he went into the time machine as if nothing had happened.
What’s more, that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
And watching this video should prove how durable Squidward can be:
“But if Squiddy’s so strong, then does SpongeBob stand a chance?”
Sadly, no matter how tough the octopus can be…
He’s not going to get anywhere close to the table sponge’s level.
That whimsical little fry cook simply defies all logic.
And, let’s not forget, SpongeBob can even go toe to toe with Aquaman.
Among DC Comics’ strongest superheroes of all time.
Sure, Squidward might get 1 punch on the table sponge.
But will this be enough to come out victorious?
No, not by a long shot.
Which leaves us with 1 last thing to discuss:
5 reasons why SpongeBob would win a fight against Squidward
#1: SpongeBob’s a lot tougher
If we’re basing off of each character’s strongest feats…
Then, SpongeBob comes out on top.
For example, in season 11, in The String episode.
The yellow table sponge miraculously unravels the world.
And carries the weight of the entire universe on his shoulder.
How does he do it, you ask?
He simply tugged on a piece of string.
A small snag out of Squiddy’s shirt.
And in a matter of seconds.
He caused the world’s undoing.
An achievement only a God could possibly do.
Of course, on the opposite side of the ring, Squidward’s pretty tough too.
For example, back in season 1, in the SB-129 episode.
The octopus managed to break the time machine.
And he ended up trapped inside infinity.
A dimension beyond understanding.
Where all time and space were immeasurable.
So what does Squidward do that makes him so strong?
Well, he forcibly opened a hole in that dimension.
Something that sent him back to the correct timeline.
An ability that left me dumbfounded.
But is that enough to beat SpongeBob?
Sadly, it’s not.
When comparing the two situations…
Squidward was going all out.
And we can assume that was 100% of his effort.
In contrast, the table sponge kept singing his tune like it was a normal day.
So if SpongeBob were to put down even 50% of his power.
It would be a disaster for Squidward.
#2: SpongeBob’s super annoying
It’s not a mystery that the table sponge gets on his co-worker’s nerves.
We see it all the time.
And whether he’s whistling or simply flipping patties.
Anything SpongeBob does makes Squidward go nuts.
But what does this have to do with a fight, you ask?
Well, a study shows stress can have dangerous effects.
Most especially to the body.
And constant exposure to it can lead to diseases and illnesses.
As a result, it’s already game over for Squiddy.
SpongeBob doesn’t even have to lift a finger.
He just needs to be himself.
And, with enough time, the grumpy octopus will have to admit defeat.
Read also: 7 Real Reasons Why SpongeBob Is So Annoying (Updated)
“But isn’t Squidward pretty good at handling stress?”
If you think going crazy and reckless is good stress management…
Then, maybe.
However, I won’t deny this could work to Squiddy’s advantage.
For example, in season 8, in the Are You Happy Now? episode.
It showed that going over the edge made the octopus ecstatic.
And while he wasn’t himself by the end of the episode.
It was pretty clear that Squidward was a lot stronger then.
But will insanity be enough to match SpongeBob being annoying?
I don’t think so.
Even if Squidward lands a punch on the table sponge.
It won’t even hurt him.
SpongeBob’s immune to nearly all physical attacks.
And Squiddy’s not going to be able to pull out any crazy gadgets to use anytime soon.
#3: SpongeBob can duplicate himself
Do you know what’s scarier than 1 yellow table sponge?
2 of them.
And the worst part?
These fry cooks can duplicate themselves.
As many times as they want.
You see, sea sponges can reproduce via budding.
It’s a process of asexual production.
Wherein the main body develops an outgrowth.
Until it falls off and becomes its own host.
And you can bet that SpongeBob knows his way around it too.
For example, back in season 2, in the Pressure episode.
The sink sponge even showed it off to Sandy.
A scene where smaller SpongeBobs started to emerge from the main body.
Of course, I don’t expect them to have the same strength as the yellow table sponge.
But even if they have a fraction of what he could do.
Squidward’s in for a hard time in order to handle multiple SpongeBobs.
“What about Squiddy’s Captain Magma powers? They should be effective.”
As cool as shooting blasts of lava sounds.
It’s not going to do much to SpongeBob.
Maybe back in season 1, in the Tea at the Treedome episode.
When the yellow table sponge couldn’t handle the heat.
And would need a constant source of water to stay hydrated.
But he’s already gone through so much growth.
For example, in the Nicktoons Unite! videogame.
SpongeBob was sprayed with a powerful tonic.
Something that would let him replenish and hydrate without a water source.
So unless Squidward can reverse engineer the work of Jimmy Neutron.
A boy genius and the star of his own cartoon.
No amount of magma’s going to dry up SpongeBob anytime soon.
#4: Squidward’s got a lot of weaknesses
While we’ve been busy stacking the octopus and sea sponge’s abilities against each other.
There’s one thing we shouldn’t forget.
These sea creatures aren’t perfect.
And Squidward, in particular, has a lot of weaknesses.
Most of them SpongeBob can use to his advantage in a fight.
For example, Squiddy’s never been good with jellyfish.
And who else’s widely considered one of the best at catching these jelly-filled critters?
None other than SpongeBob.
So if he takes the battle to Jellyfish Fields.
Squidward will be too busy fending off these pink creatures.
A perfect opportunity for SpongeBob to strike.
What’s more, in the Reef Blower episode, the octopus can’t handle the sponge’s lawn equipment.
And if he tags this along in a battle to the death.
The octopus won’t get anywhere near SpongeBob.
#5: Squidward gives up too easily
Motivation is hard to measure.
And it’s effects vary from person to person.
But a study proves that it’s generally good for students.
In fact, believing in oneself can influence better academic performance.
So what does this have to do with the battle?
Well, Squidward’s the least-motivated sea creature in Bikini Bottom.
And when it comes to handling the cash register…
You’re more likely to find him sleeping on the job than working.
In contrast, SpongeBob is the shining icon of high motivation.
He does everything with a smile.
Even if it’s the smallest inconvenience that doesn’t deserve his time.
As a result, if everything comes down to a battle to the death between the two.
Squiddy might give up way sooner than you can imagine.
Bonus: SpongeBob’s too kind to hurt his friend
However, there’s one thing we need to consider.
The yellow table sponge actually loves the octopus
In fact, some fans believe Squidward’s part of SpongeBob’s romantic life.
As a result, Krusty Krab’s famous fry cook doesn’t have it in him to hurt his co-worker.
And if we’re accounting for each character’s personality.
SpongeBob will do anything to help Squiddy.
Even if it means giving the octopus an advantage during their battle.
But Squidward won’t see this as pity.
He’ll view it as an opportunity to win.
A chance at beating SpongeBob once and for all.
And because the table sponge’s too kind to hurt his friend.
It will be his downfall.